Sunday, January 17, 2021

#2, so far

I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this: someday, I hope to have these blog posts printed and bound.  Not published, mind you - just put into book form for posterity’s sake.  I’ve kept a couple journals in my lifetime and also have some pretty priceless documentation of childhood family vacations (read: time stamps of every rest stop, full menu rundowns of every meal, and riveting reviews of destinations like “Neat!” and “Cool!”), but otherwise, this is the closest I’ve come to documenting life happenings and associated emotions.  So, that’s why I often say I’m writing something for posterity’s sake.  I share it all publicly, because family and friends are so spread out, and while I’d love to catch up with each of you over coffee, or even quick phone conversation, that’s just not feasible (even pre-COVID).  Since I know you care, though, I utilize “the scoop” to keep you in the loop.  (Jacob’s really into rhyming words, these days. You can maybe tell we hang out a lot...)

Ok - onto the real reason for posting today.  Actually - a few reasons.  First, wanted to document the first photo Jacob has taken:
Not this one.  This is just the one that "started it all..."
Lydia was out of pajamas before anyone else this morning, because she lost some of her first breakfast on hers.  So, wanted to document this cute outfit from Aunt Roo before any second breakfast ended up on it.
Then, Jacob asked to be in a photo (I'll almost always oblige him here, because I know (assume) the day will come that it will be a struggle to get him to pose for a picture, much less smile.)
Look at them looking at each other! ♥
The sweet kid even asked if he "did his good smile," because when he went through the "silly smile" phase, we often asked for a "good smile," and turns out, he didn't really know how to consciously make that happen.
THEN, he said, "Now I should take one of you two!" 
The idea/offer really surprised me - he's never asked or been asked to take a picture.  I almost declined, because I wasn't "photo ready" with my morning face and second-day braids (post-partum hair loss is in full swing, so I'm doing anything I can to contain all the rogue strands), but I quickly decided to just oblige HIM and see what happened.
The above is a sampling of the 50+ shots he got, some of which I truly love (mostly because Lydia - I mean, come on) and others of which I didn't plan to share publicly, but then, why not?

Secondly, many of you probably saw a recent post I made on Instagram about how real life has been, lately. I’ll share it here for reference:
Lydia and I haven’t slept in more than 2-3 hour stretches for several weeks. 
Jacob has been struggling with following directions and not talking back, lately, and sugar from special treats (like once-annual snow ice cream) do him no favors in this department. 
Meal-planning is still a pipe dream, because time is precious and I prioritize other things (like playing in the snow), even though lack of planning and prep aren’t helping me reach my pre-pregnancy body goals (no need for this to become a body image thing - I could probably write a whole post on that - I have a lot of grace for myself, right now; it’s just a matter of fact that my clothes don’t fit like I wish they did).
The “survival mode”-ness of this season often makes me feel like I’m failing as a wife and friend. 
All that said, hard things like those mentioned are more easily forgiven/forgotten in light of sweet moments like those captured in these snowy day pictures (as well as so many others I post on the regular). 
So thankful for God’s grace and the way He provides rest when possible and baby smiles when it’s fleeting, extra doses of patience and unsolicited hugs, and a true teammate of a husband as we navigate this whole parenting thing. 
I know everyone has their own version of a “things are not always as they seem” sort of post, and I don’t know that I’ve really written one. So, please just know that while we do have some pretty sweet moments with our really cute kids, there are several hard moments to go along with each. It’s just really dark and difficult to take pictures at 2, 3, and 4 a.m. and shots of a tantruming toddler are usually blurry. 😏
#lovethem #snowday #thatprobablyshouldvebeenablogpost 😬

I received so many kind and encouraging comments, notes, and even surprise mail after posting that.  Thanks to those of you who took time to share your two cents!  I thought I’d update you on how things are going, now:

Sleep is on the upswing!  Prior to her 4-month appt., I was feeding Lydia on demand - supplementing with formula after daytime feedings and just nursing at nighttime.  So, even though her night was from about 7 p.m.-7 a.m., she was crying out several times, and in an effort to make sure she was receiving the nourishment she needed (and keep her quiet so as not to wake Jacob in the next room), I just fed her each time.  (This was after figuring out she wanted her arms out of the swaddle...and always trying the pacifier first, only for her to reject it.)  Of course, my body often wouldn't allow me to go right back to sleep after being up, and on more than one occasion, Jacob called out for something in the middle of the night between Lydia's feedings.  My silver lining in all this was being able to crawl back under my cozy electric blanket several times a night - haha.

I was anxious to see how Lydia's growth was progressing and talk to the doctor about her thoughts on nighttime, and I was so glad to know she's right on track growth-wise and we can skip nighttime feedings (all except for one, if we want).  We're about a week out from that appt. and starting our new habits, but it's already such a relief.  Though she still wakes up most of the times she was previously, I'm only feeding her once in the middle of the night, and she has been able to put herself back to sleep after only a few minutes of sleepy crying the other times.  Phew.  Here's hoping she'll continue dropping some(all!) of those waking-up times ASAP.
This is how she often sleeps.  I know the lighting isn’t great, but I wasn’t going to risk waking her for a pic.  Just wanted to try to document her little hands behind her head. ♥

Jacob is doing better, behavior-wise, most days.  I truly think this is due to us cutting down on his sugar intake.  He wasn't having a lot, in the first place, but we've just been careful to not give him much, at all, in a day's time.  The few times we've given him a treat or had an out-of-the-ordinary day have made it very evident that he has a harder time controlling himself when he's had more sugar than normal.  It's crazy.  And kinda sad, because I'd love to share more treats with him, but it's been good to find other things to reward him with...which, in turn, helps create better habits for ourselves...

...speaking of which - we have a plan in place for that!  More on that later (hopefully).

Also - we’re just over a year since finding out we were expecting baby #2, so thought I’d reflect a bit on how the having two kids thing is going.  I actually don't know that I can concisely put it all into words, so I'll just leave a short bullet-point list, for now:
  • It's gone better than I expected, which may actually be thanks to COVID.  There's not a lot pulling us in other directions/outside of our home, so we've been able to create and maintain rhythms that make the most sense for us, right now.  While I'm sad to not be able to "share" Lydia more, I'm glad for the valid excuse to lay low and keep her routine in tact most every day.
  • I love watching Jacob be a big brother.  As Lydia has started to be more and more interactive, he's been more and more interactive with her.  He's a wonderful and willing helper (a lot of the time without even being asked...esp. when it comes to fetching clean diapers), he's including her in his play (again - without being asked), and he cheers her on with every new development.  It's just precious.
  • I forgot how much I love babies.  I mean, yeah - I knew and know I love babies, but I kinda forgot why.  The cooing, the smiling, the squishiness - it's just all so sweet.
  • Surprise - I really can love two kiddos equally and at the same time. ♥
As always, thanks to you all for sharing our journey - from near or afar - and caring about our family.  Looking forward to the day we can visit/see you in person, but in the meantime, thanks for keeping in touch.  Take care!

Motherly-ly,
Kensy

Favorites of the day:
Anita's Famous Rolls
Marco Polo (the app)
gift cards
the new Brown Sugar Chai Latte from Scooter's (I've only had it blended, so far, but anxious to try it hot!)

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