How does your garden grow?

Yes, I'm still here.  No, I don't have any one/good explanation as to why I've not posted in so many months.  Yikes.  I have been waiting to share a few things till they're fully completed and wrapped with a shiny bow, and sometimes, things take longer than originally anticipated...and in the meantime, since we're busy working on these projects, I run out of time to tell you about anything else.

One of the things I've been wanting/meaning to share about is our flower beds and garden.  I tried to take pictures throughout the growing season of allll the things we planted.  Some of these continued to flourish well into fall, and then Thanksgiving and the holiday season hit...and for once, I didn't have the post started and ready to add finishing touches to once we had a hard freeze and things stopped growing...so...you get to read this in the dead of winter.  Maybe it was for the best, and this can serve as a reminder of the warmth and color that is to come.  Haha.

You might remember another post about these projects from a couple years ago.  Since everything was well-established this year, I thought I'd fill you in on how everything filled in!  ;)

Anyway, this will be mostly pictures along with some brief explanations.

We inherited iris from a few different people.

(This variety was one of my grandma's favorites.)

They didn't bloom last year, so it was fun to be surprised by what came out this year!

"Don't you think daisies are the friendliest flower?"

This sweet rose bush came with the house.

A neighbor gave us some "surprise" bulbs, so we were surprised by these daylilies!

Sweetspire

Our first bee balm blooms.

This stuff blew our minds...it covered probably twice as much ground by the end of the season.
PLEASE let us know if you want any starts - we have two patches this size!

These lilies were not a surprise.  ☺

We thought we'd lost the mums after they were confused by a couple unseasonably warm days in the dead of winter, but two of the three pulled through!

Our neighbors shared some hostas shortly after we moved in, and they've done so well!
I even used some of the leaves and blooms as decoration for a church women's event at the end of the summer.

Of course, I didn't get a picture of the full bed...mostly because things were in full bloom at different times (which was intentional), but you get this idea!  Now, for the garden:

Just a bunch of baby plants out there!

Our first harvest!
(We got maybe five more snap peas after this...)

My little helper, who had previously turned down cucumbers, appointed himself as "Quality Control" for the entirety of the season.  No argument here...this is one of the reason we planted a garden.  ☺

We probably should've counted the amazing number of cucumbers our five plants produced over the course of the very wet, not-too-hot spring/summer.  No, I never put up any pickles - we just gave a bunch away...and ate a lot.

Tomatoes were a welcome addition to our produce collection once they finally started turning!

We had no problems with deer this year, PTL!

Our one watermelon vine!

Pulled these off right before the first freeze.
There were MANY more on the vine, at one point - we'd taken several off early on and left a few on to chance the freeze.

Not too bad!

I think I've already told you about this little surprise petunia, but as a refresher:
I thought it was a weed, at one point.  It was a tiny little leaf of a plant growing among (obvious) weeds in my annual pot, and I almost pulled it in preparation for more annuals this year.  But...I decided to leave it, and I'm so glad I did!

It just kept on growing...

...and surviving...

...and blooming...

...all the way through the end of October!  I've never seen anything like it.  It was the best surprise!

There you have it.  Like I've said before, one of the purposes of this blog is to document pieces of my life for posterity's sake.  So, while I don't expect you to have been waiting on pins and needles to see how all our new plants fared, I do appreciate the interest (some of) you have in the less-exciting details of our life. ☺♥

Gardenly(?),
Kensy

Favorites of the day:

Baja Shrimp Tacos from Twisted Fresh

Favorite Things parties! 
And my favorite thing for the parties this year?  Handmade greeting cards! 
I made 8 sets of 10 over the course of several months to take to two different parties.

everything about this...but really, my husband
I snapped this picture a couple months ago.  It's what I came home to after a morning of playing on worship team at church...and after a night of being up with a sick kiddo (his/our first run-in with "throw up").  Not only did Bryant stay home to care for Jacob that morning while I was gone, but he also did the laundry, baked bread, and did all the dishes. ♥
This is just one shining example of how well he cares for us.

Our Village

When I was in the 5th(?) grade, I was asked to accompany the school choir on a song called, "If It Takes a Village."  (This is the closest I could come to finding a recording...that's not a home video somewhere at my parents' house, that is.☺)  As a result, every time I hear the phrase "It takes a village," whether it pertains to child-rearing, ministry, whatever, I sing it in my head.

The last several weeks have been...hard.  I'm not sure that adjective encapsulates everything that we've been dealing with, but it is as good a descriptor as any.  It's seemed that as soon as we put out one fire, another one starts (not literally, thankfully, though the way things have been going, it would not have surprised me to see some actual, unexpected flames).

I'm an optimist, as you've probably gathered, and my husband is a constant helper and fixer, so we were able to keep our chins up and take on each new trial as it came.  The trials just kept coming, though, and it became harder and harder to maintain a clear mind and a positive outlook.  With the help of the Lord and our village, however, we've come out mostly unscathed and are (fingers crossed) regaining some sense of normalcy around here.

The people in our "village" did not ask for acknowledgment, and in fact, I know one in particular would cringe at the thought of being publicly recognized for kind deeds done.  As I look back on the hard things these last several weeks have brought, though, I can't not remember and acknowledge the things people have done to make our life easier in the midst of it all.  They've seen needs and met them without being asked.  They've voluntarily cared for us in ways we can never begin to repay.  They've come alongside us physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually in such tangible and practical ways, and I'm simply in awe of the generosity, kindness, and love we've been shown.

Our "village" has truly been the hands and feet of Christ to us, recently.  They always have been, of course, but I think I have possibly taken it for granted, or maybe just not always recognized it so clearly when life wasn't so "hard."  I'd like to take this opportunity, however, to acknowledge some of the specific ways we have been blessed by others in the recent past.  Our "village" is made up of both family and friends, and some of them were part of multiple deeds listed here.  Please know this is not a comprehensive list, by any means.

Lately, people in our "village" have been known to:

• invite us over for leftover cupcakes, because they knew how sad we were to miss the party.
• clean our house while they're there to let the dog out.
• make serious headway on our basement remodeling project while we were away for the weekend.
• sit with me while I make and accept the hardest decision.
• babysit our kiddo for free while I was away making that decision.
• watch our kiddo during piano lessons because plans changed last-minute.
• ask us to come swim because they enjoy watching our baby play in the water as much as we do.
• offer to come for a visit the week before we throw a birthday party, so they can help.
• put away leftovers after a party without being asked.
• bring me a sweet commemorative gift in honor of our kitty.
• invite us to stay at their house till our AC is fixed immediately upon telling them it broke (several people did this, and we actually took one of them up on it).
• cook meals for us while we're staying at their house.
• give input and genuinely care about our son's mysterious rash (it turned out to be nothing serious).
• give us Freon for our AC.
• bring their special tools to help fix our AC.

We're safe, healthy, cool (praise the Lord), and grateful.  If you did something on this list for us, thank you.  You know who you are, and if I haven't said it enough already, you've blessed us beyond measure.  If you feel I'm leaving something/someone out, please, please let me know.  It would be impossible to list everything anyone has ever done for us, but like I said, the large and small things people have done for us, lately, just added up so quickly, I couldn't help but share.

Gratefully,
Kensy

P.S. Immediately prior to posting this, my computer died (because it wasn't plugged in, though I thought it was) - wouldn't that have been the cherry on top of all this?  Ha.

Favorites of the day:

the splash park

garden-fresh cherry tomatoes

the fact that our baby boy loves to read to himself

He Loves *2* Clean!

We officially have a two-year-old, as of a couple weeks ago, and we recently had a belated birthday party for him!  Due to his love of vacuums, sweeping, dusting, etc., we (I) decided his party theme should be “cleaning.”  Strange, non-traditional, uncommon?  Yes.  Fun, silly, apropos?  Also, yes.  ☺  I figured this would likely be the last year I chose his theme, so just thought we'd have some fun with it.

I tried to carefully document the party in order to share it here, for several reasons.  I am not sharing this to elicit any comparison, shame, guilt, judgement, whatever...  I truly enjoy doing this kind of thing, so while I may lose some sleep in order to put it all together, the creative outlet it allows is life-giving, to me.  I totally understand others would rather buy a cake and call it good - totally fine.  You do you.  The reason I'm sharing is because I spent a lot of time compiling and coming up with the party elements, and if documenting and sharing them means some other mother-of-a-toddler-who-loves-to-clean has to spend less time doing so, it's worth it to me.  I've also had several questions about the party, upon me (or guests) telling others about it, so thought I'd try to answer all the questions in one place.  

So, here's some "show and tell" for you!  Hope you enjoy.

The shirt:

This is one idea I can take credit for (with the help of my Cricut, of course).  I'm really glad he was turning two, because I don't know what I would've done with a "3," "4, " "10," or any other number.

He also received a really cute birthday shirt from his Nanny that he got to wear on his actual birthday.  The "2" fabric had cleaning supplies on it!  So fun.  

Shirt courtesy of Nanny (Greatstitch)!

The decorations:

I kept these pretty simple, because we were mostly outside for this celebration.  Once again, however, my (generously-gifted-to-me) Cricut came in handy to make some garland (so did an ultra-helpful friend who spent time putting it together for me)!  The party hats were leftover from last year, the HBD banner may be as old as I am, the flowers were from a sweet friend a couple weeks ago, and the star lights were a post-4th-of-July clearance find last year, and this seemed like as good a time as any to break them out.

The activities:

One of the first ideas I had for this party was sponge relay races.  This one came to me when Menards had a pack of sponges free on rebate.  I'd nannied for some kiddos who attended a Montessori preschool and remembered "water transfer" being one of their activities.  So, I thought we could do this on a bigger scale and make it a game.  With several toddlers involved, it became a free-for-all, of course, but they really got the hang of it and enjoyed it!  I wasn't able to get many good pictures of this activity, but they just "transferred water" between the kiddie pool and a couple dish pans - all of which we already had on hand!  (We've since played with the sponges in the pool and the bathtub - this one was definitely a "win!")

We also did spray bottle art!  I recall seeing spray bottles as part of the decor and/or favors for one of the Pinterest parties I perused.  This made me wonder if using them to create artwork was possible, and after some more research, I found a few ways to do so.  Because I already had it on hand, I chose to use a hefty dose of coordinating food coloring in each of the colored Dollar Tree spray bottles.  Guests created designs with tape, sprayed them with their color(s) of choice, then left them to dry in the sun.  The (Amazon) canvases weren't exactly what I'd expected, and the project as a whole didn't go quite as I thought it might (the end results even turned out differently than my example piece - haha), but it was still fun and enjoyable, and they turned out kinda cool!

The favors:

These bunny birthday grahams were the perfect treat to serve as "dust bunnies" in the favor bags!  Also, you know I couldn't resist the mini bunny fruit snacks!  I think I'd seen a "dust bunnies" label on food in one of the few cleaning/vacuum party listings I found on Pinterest, but it was on something non-bunny-related...maybe cotton candy, or something that looks more like real dust bunnies...?  Anyway, I amended the idea a bit.  Everyone also got to take home their spray bottle art canvases.  I'd intended to send each of the kiddos home with a spray bottle, too, but of course, didn't remember this until after they'd left.

The food:

Again, some of these labels came from Pinterest ideas, and some came from my own head.  Mac & Cheese is one of the birthday boy's favorite dishes, so that was the first thing on the menu.  I tried a new recipe, and luckily, it was a hit!  So thankful for those who helped prep, make, and clean up in this department!

The cake:

This one was also an original idea, but here's why: I was avoiding making a vacuum-shaped cake at all costs.  I just didn't want to figure out how to construct it, store it (in summertime), cut/serve it, etc.  I know I could have - I just didn't really want to.  So, instead, I found a dollhouse miniature Dyson on Etsy (totally worth the few dollars for me to not have to build a vacuum).  I didn't know what I was going to do with it till I was literally frosting the cake, when the idea to have it vacuuming crumbs in the shape of a "2" just came to me!  The sponge-in-bucket-of-sudsy-water cupcake idea originated when I was looking at the free Menards sponges and realized they looked like Rice Krispie treats.  I can't really tell you how I got from that piece of an idea to the end result, though - haha.  It just kind-of all came together, and I was really pleased with it!  Of course, the birthday boy could've cared less how the cake looked - he would've been thrilled to get to eat cake in any form or fashion - but it was really fun to make this theme cake, even though never did I ever expect to be placing bubble sprinkles with tweezers the night before my child's second birthday party... ☺

This party was simply some good clean fun! ;) 

Celebratorily,

Kensy

Favorites of the day:

super generous friends

post-pool showers

these guys
(and this ~$3 tanktop - JCP!)

The Hardest Decision

I'm wondering whether or not I should be writing about this while it's so fresh, but I'm going to so that:
1. I remember what happened and what I'm feeling,
2. I can share with you in one fell swoop, and
3. If you couldn't already tell, writing is sometimes the best way I can/know how to process things.

So...

We had to put Charlie down today.

Because I know you're wondering:
He had been throwing up for the last day and half, or so, and the last day was barely moving and just not acting himself, at all.  It's been a very full/crazy couple of weeks for us, and this week is no exception, but I was able to find someone to come stay with Jacob today (on his birthday) during his nap, so I could get Charlie checked out.  Was thinking it would be a quick trip with maybe some meds prescribed, or something.

Come to find out, though, he had a urinary blockage that would require expensive sedation, treatment, and hospitalization to remedy it.  As the doctor was explaining it, I thought, "Well, that sounds treatable, but expensive." and it was.  When I asked if there were any other options, she said, basically, "It's this, or putting him down."  Cue the tears.  That truly hit me (hard) out of left field.

Knowing what to spend on pets is hard no matter what your financial circumstances, in my opinion, but especially for us, as we've just come out of a fairly large home renovation project.  I hated to have finances be a factor in deciding what to do today, but I would be lying if I said they weren't a small factor...and that hurts me to say/type.

The larger factor, and what ultimately made the decision (a little) easier, however, was that this "operation" and treatment didn't guarantee it wouldn't happen again.  It was also not guaranteed that Charlie would be strong enough to come out of the sedation after not having eaten or drank for so long.  He would have had to be on meds for a bit after the operation and special prescription food forever.

Bryant was not able to leave work, but my bestie, Katie, kindly offered to come be with me at the vet when I called her barely able to speak.  Can't say how much I appreciated having someone there to cry with me.  It was just so, so very difficult to know what to do.

What makes me most sad, I think, is not having such a wonderful playmate for Jacob living in our home.  Jacob loved Charlie so much, and even when he saw him last, and Charlie was barely responding, Jacob was loving on him and cooing about him, all the same.  I'd always been looking forward to them playing together, but I also knew the day would come when we had to say goodbye to Charlie, and I'd wondered how we would explain it to Jacob and how he would feel.  Perhaps this is a blessing in disguise in that we won't have to do that, now (though we will have to say goodbye to Pepper, at some point).  He's aware enough to say, "Hmm...kitty...?" in the sweetest voice as he looks for him, but he will soon forget and not know to be sad, and that's ok.

Charlie was with me through the biggest changes in my life (life after college, marriage, moving, motherhood), and though I know he lived a good life, I fear I took advantage of his constant presence.  I don't think it's hit me, yet, that he's not coming back.  Perhaps it will the first time I sit down during naptime and don't have an immediate lap-warmer.  Or the next time I open a can of tuna and don't hear little paws come running.  I wonder if/how Pepper will notice.  I wonder if/when Jacob will ask about him.

But mostly I wonder if I made the right decision.  I know I probably did, but it all happened so quickly, and I was so, so unprepared.  I'm not writing this to fish for encouragement, sympathy, or affirmation.  I'm just being honest as I process something I've never dealt with before - something I never thought to prepare myself to deal with.

I know there is no way for anyone else to understand exactly what I'm feeling, and I will not be able to articulate it all, but I know some of you have had to go through similar experiences.  If that's you, I'm sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry for the way having to make that kind of decision made(makes?) you feel.  There's no way of knowing if losing him would have been any easier had I known it was coming, had he been older (he'd just turned 9), had he been sick longer, etc., but I think I can say for sure that it would have been easier had I not had to make the decision myself.

I know peace will come.  I know time will pass.  I know he lived a good and full life and was well-loved.  But I also know I'm just really sad and wish he was still going to be in our family for the foreseeable future.  As of now, thinking about Charlie and the fond memories of him does not make me sad - I'm glad for them.  Seeing other cats does not make me sad - I still love cats.  Thinking about what could've been - that's what makes me sad.  He was more a part of my life than I realize, I think, and he will be greatly missed.

Katie graciously obliged when I asked her to take one last picture of us.
(He was just sleeping here.)
♥

Sadly,
Kensy

Favorites of the day:

Jacob's excitement about his birthday festivities (and the fact that he kept wanting to sing "Happy Birthday" to me every time someone sang it to him)

family and friends

Weeds

I spent at least eight solid hours pulling weeds in the garden last week and a few more this week. Praise the Lord for those willing to help do the dirty work, watch the baby, etc. to help complete this task.  Pretty sure as I've stepped further into adulthood, my top love language has become "acts of service," and a few people in my life sure love me extra-well in this way.

I'm telling you this not to get you to come help out, too (although, if you or someone you know needs a lesson in manual labor, you know who to call...), but rather, I have some introspective thoughts to share about it (surprise, surprise - for those long-time readers/followers, out there - haha).  I'm confident I'm not the first person to draw these parallels, and I know I won't be the last, but I don't know that I've seen/read an analogy like this in my own circles/studies, so that's why I thought I'd share these thoughts that keep surfacing as I think more about it all.

First, let me explain these weeds:
I pulled up a few baby oak and maple trees, a few stray blades of crabgrass, and a dandelion or two (though only in the flowerbeds), but the bulk of my time was spent pulling Bermudagrass.  This stuff is simply insane.  According to that website I just linked to, "it spreads by both above-ground stems known as stolons and below-ground stems called rhizomes."  This means you can't just pull up the blade, get a couple inches of root, and call it a day.  Rather, to be most effective, you must dig down and find the root the blade is connected to and try to follow/pull it up as far as you can in hopes of reaching the end and/or original root.  The most satisfying results of these efforts are roots a few feet in length.

I realize some people grow this grass on purpose, so may not consider it a weed.  After "letting it go" in our garden last year, though, it has established itself in a way that is not conducive to our otherwise weed-free Back to Eden gardening system.  So, in an effort to eliminate it and not let it get out of control again, we've been trying to nip every glimpse of green we see in the bud and get as many of the already-established roots out of the garden area as we can.  (Yes, we've gone around the edge and severed those coming in from the outside...and will likely do so again as time goes on.  Yes, we could spray it, but we're trying to go chemical-free in this area, and also, trying to eliminate the root systems, altogether.  If you have suggestions you think we could try within these parameters, we'd be open to them!)

Now for the introspective, spiritual parallels I've been drawing between pulling weeds and doing work on yourself/your soul/your mental health, presented in the form of some tips for both:

Eliminating the weeds allows other plants to thrive.

• We started some of the plants in our garden from plants and some from seeds.  Both require space, nutrients, and moisture to live and grow.  If we didn't rid the ground around them of the weeds, they would not be able to acquire the necessary things to live, or at least, to grow to their fullest potential.
  I feel like this is fairly obvious, but allowing the "weeds" in your heart to grow will overpower and potentially kill the "fruitful plants."  Whether it's practicing having positive thoughts, rather than negative ones, or perhaps working on assuming the best of people, rather than the worst, or maybe making healthy choices over more convenient ones - what comes naturally and "grows easiest" isn't always best for us.  We must recognize and address these things.

It's going to be messy.

• I usually do this work bare-handed, but even when I wore gloves, I still got lots of dirt under my nails. (It was dark when I finished this the first time, so didn't get a good picture, but this gives you an idea...kinda.) 
  You can try to protect yourself from the residual "mess" that comes with soul-searching, counseling/therapy, hard conversations, etc., but you're not likely to come out completely "clean"/unscathed.  Bringing things to the surface that would rather be thriving "underground" is not an easy job, but it can be so necessary and beneficial.  The "dirt under your nails" that surfaces, as well, is nothing a little extra scrubbing can't fix.

You can't do it alone.

• At this time in my life, to be able to devote time to this task and be truly effective, I needed help.  I couldn't devote the necessary time and attention to it when Jacob was with me, and it got dark too quickly for me to be able to do it only when he was in bed.  In order to keep the weeds at bay, I really needed to get them all pulled up in a few day's time (between stormy days, really).  So, help from others was a must.  Like I mentioned earlier, this help came both in the form of weed-pulling and childcare while I did so.
  When you're doing some "weeding" of your heart and soul, you'll likely need help.  Whether it comes in the form of a book, a mental health professional, a trusted loved one, or a podcast - there are tools, people, and resources that can help you reach your goals much quicker than you could alone.  The Lord is always on your side, as well, and though He can't watch the baby while you go to a session/take a walk/"pull the weeds," He's sure rooting for you and can/will provide in ways you might not even know you need.

Wear sunscreen.

• ...especially on the back of your neck.
  I don't have a parallel for this one, but I guess if you're doing any self-reflection outside or taking a mental health day at the pool, it absolutely applies.  

Track your progress and reward yourself.

Day 1: One hour's worth.

Day 2: Three hours' worth.

Day ?...some(?) hours' worth.

• I realize it's hard to know what you're seeing here, especially since I don't have any sort of "before" picture, but basically, it's just a bunch of dead roots.  My "reward" is listed in today's favorites...☺
  I don't really know how to best recommend you do this when you're working on yourself, but I think it's pretty subjective, anyway.  Figure out how to measure/track your progress and don't be afraid to share it publicly.  Celebrate (alone or with others) your victories - big and small.  You're absolutely worth it.  

You can't just cover them up and expect them to go away.

• The dead weeds pictured above are laying on top of some bags of leaves from this fall.  We put the bags on the spots in the garden that were most grassy last year in hopes of killing off the plants.  No such luck - the roots found their way out and up from under these and just kept growing.
  You can try to bury memories, habits, etc., but most likely, they'll find a way to surface.  In order to truly be your best self, you must address and tend to these things in your life/mind/heart.

Be careful not to pull something that isn't a weed.

• ...or isn't a weed in the area you're gardening, at least (for example, baby oak trees are considered weeds in our garden, but wouldn't be in a forest).  I noticed something growing among the crabgrass and baby trees in the pot on our front step, so I transplanted it to the middle of the pot and decided to see what came of it.  As it turns out, it's a petunia!  These flowers are usually considered annuals (you have to replant them each year), but apparently, this one decided to be a perennial - what a lovely surprise!
  There may be a trait you don't love about yourself, a memory/experience you'd rather forget, or perhaps, an incident you regret.  Often, it's good to purge these "weeds," but sometimes, they may actually be valuable and "grow" into something beautiful.  Closely inspect these things.  Be careful not to rid yourself of something that may enhance your life and future experiences.  Be on the lookout for beauty among the "weeds."   

I hope this spoke to you, in one way or another.  Please know I am not condemning anyone or commanding you do any of this.  I'm simply explaining some parallels that made themselves extremely clear to me during this process.  Would love to hear any others you think of!

Looking forward to garden-fresh produce,
Kensy

Favorites of the day:

how well my husband and my dad work together

Tiramisu Cone from one of the vendors at Festa Italiana.
I call it "Walking Tiramisu," and it was as good as it looks!

Hard to capture, but Jacob always shares the things he "cooks/bakes" with the animals, in addition to the humans.
He does a great job making sure EVERYone takes turns and gets "bites," and I just think it's precious.