Our ONEderful Little Ladybug

Thank you all for your sweet feedback surrounding my previous post about our gardening adventures!  Between that and birthday celebrations, the summer really flew by.  I'm realizing only just now that I never posted about Jacob's birthday festivities - woops!  Will try to do so soon.  Speaking of his birthday - I looked back at his first bday post when deciding what to title this one, and apparently, we have a "bug" theme going...haha.

There are so many things I could write a blog post about, right now.  Everything in the world just feels heavy; I can feel it all in the pit of my stomach as I write this.  We have experienced things on both personal and global levels that leave us feeling helpless, discouraged, anxious...the list goes on.  It probably doesn't help that we just visited the Auschwitz exhibit at Union Station (I would highly recommend taking the opportunity to experience this, if you're able).  I have not been able to collect my swarming thoughts enough to talk about it all, much less write about it, at this point.  So, instead, I'd like to share something that has brought us joy in the recent past: Lydia's first birthday!

Our sweet baby girl has been such a light in our lives, as well as the lives of those around us - including you, perhaps!  While I am (mostly) saddened by the end of the newborn and baby phases, it is thrilling to watch her personality continue to blossom.  She is learning and trying and showing us new things every day, and it's just so fun!  It's especially sweet to be able to watch it all unfold through Jacob's eyes, as well, and bear witness to their ever-strengthening relationship.

As you likely (safely) assumed if you saw my Facebook post about the celebration, the "ladybug" theme was Pinterest-inspired, and it was executed with the help of Dollar Tree and my Cricut.  I have found I truly enjoy putting together a theme party - not only for the "awe"/"aww" it evokes in guests, but also for the creative processes that go into creating the various elements.  Admittedly, when it comes to crunch time, I can become slightly high-strung and one little thing going awry may send me over the edge.  When I can remember to relax and enjoy the process and the event, however, it truly is a joy.  (It helps, of course, when kiddos nap and/or go to bed on time, so I have ample windows of opportunity to do all this.  Shoutout and huge thanks to my ever-helpful and patient husband who creates space for this, regardless of how the kids' sleeping schedules pan out.)  I have tried to pinpoint who exactly I "do it all" for, and I've had a hard time doing so, because I think I can honestly answer, "Everyone involved."  I thought about the very real possibility of the celebration having only been our little immediate family, and even then, I would have done most all of what I did.  Not only for Lydia's sake, but also for Jacob's, for my own, and for the sake of sharing it virtually with those who couldn't be there.  While that wasn't completely the case, I'm still happy to share with you!  ☺

It all came together even better than I'd imagined.
(Of course, I already had that polka-dot wrapping paper and red bows in my collection.)

♥
Yes, I painted her toes for the occasion.  You're not surprised.

This was a variation on a couple ideas I'd seen, and one guest immediately recognized them for what they were supposed to represent.  Perhaps, given the context, you do, as well.  ;)

Perfect way to use up some of our countless cherry tomatoes!
(Headless ladybugs for those guests who "don't do" olives.)

The cake and cupcakes were an end-of-the-night project, and I'm just "ok" with how they turned out.

There was way more frosting on her smash cake (which Jacob called a "smoosh" cake all week - haha) than I originally intended, but at that point, I thought, "It is what it is," and just went with it.

This is as close as I got to getting a full table-scape picture - haha.
(I'm not sure how to feel admitting that I didn't purchase any of the paper/plasticware for this party, but rather, shopped my stash of clearance purchases...many of which were made years ago.  I'm not the only one who collects these things for "such a time as this," right?)

♥

We tried to get a picture of her with the cake...

...and even though she likely had no idea what it actually was, she was very upset when we took it away to put in a candle.

She was fine once we started singing and even more fine when she got to dig in.

It didn't even occur to me to think about the color contrast drawing her to the black dots, but it did.  She tried one of those first, and reached for every one after that...completely bypassing the red frosting - haha.

I was so tickled by how our guests embraced the theme!
(Those are ladybug crayons!)

Hand-drawn/colored wrapping paper! ♥

I came across these bookmarks in my Amazon search for party favors.  Pretty sure I had one as a kid...

We saved back one present for her to open on her actual birthday.
Needless to say, the gifts were gifts that kept on giving, as Jacob was even more excited than the birthday girl about all the new toys...and this mama was appreciative of the independent playtime it took to explore them all!  ;)

COVID necessitated multiple small celebrations of our birthday girl (still more to come!), and we are totally ok with prolonging the festivities!  One particular additional celebration included an adorable shirt and card made by Nanny Byers and a beautiful (and delicious!) strawberry cake from The Laughing Place Bakery.  (KC locals, be sure to check them out - soooo many yummy things!  They sure make it easy to support local!)

☺

Does this make you drool, or what?!  It was really yummy (and gluten free!).

Thanks, as always, for making it this far!  I hope this has provided a welcome respite from the less-happy content in your feed, in your mind, and in your heart.  We work hard to recognize and embrace the joy around us...and thankfully, there are many times we don't have to look too far for it.

I pray we can all find ways to be a little more like Jesus each day; to spread more love and joy; to eliminate division; to see and consider and have compassion on one another.  May the Lord have mercy on our broken world - past, present, and future - and may we allow Him to use us to mend it.

As joyfully as possible,

Kensy

Favorites of the day:

Ted Lasso

stamping weekend

This snack Jacob left for me to enjoy while I taught piano lessons the other day.

I was excited to put up this birthday banner as birthday month kicked off!
The monthly-pictures-with-corresponding-headbands (in rainbow order, of course) was my own original idea. ☺

The hobby I never thought I’d have

I have made mention of our garden in several posts, and it's been the main topic of a few, as well (this one, and this one, and this one).  I don't know that I have ever listed "gardening" amongst my hobbies, though.  When I came to the revelation recently, I tried to figure out why I did not necessarily recognize it as a hobby.  It does not necessarily feel like something I do in my leisure time, because it's just part of our daily rhythm.  And for pleasure...?  The time, sweat, sometimes blood, bug bites, physical exertion - those do not seem pleasurable.  

I was raised by gardeners, and growing up, I was expected to help with the tending, harvesting, and processing (washing/cutting/freezing/canning) of a large variety of produce.  While my memories of all this are not the fondest (by no fault of my parents - it was just not always my first choice of summer activities, but in retrospect and as a parent myself, now, I understand and recognize how beneficial it was), I do have fond memories of enjoying the fruits of our labor.  There's simply nothing like garden cucumbers, fresh green beans, homegrown corn on the cob, peas straight out of the pod, garden-fresh asparagus, and cherry tomatoes still warm from the sun, to name a few.  I was raised on this type of produce, so it is just in my blood to desire this for my own family, I suppose, despite knowing how much effort goes into acquiring it.  I'm so thankful to have married a man who is on board with this and was even excited to research, build, and maintain such a wonderful garden plot for us.

Hard to capture it all in one picture, but I'm always amazed at what grows from seemingly nothing.
(You can see "before" pictures in the links above - it looked the same this year before things started growing.)

I think gardening is fairly universally considered to be hard work. That said, I think it can be as much or as little work as you make it.  If you're ok with weeds between rows, bugs and other pests, and plants that might not be at their happiest, then the simple act of harvesting is fairly straightforward, and the time commitment is only dependent on the size of your garden plot.   If you're like me, however, and want to pull every weed you see, keep the pests at bay (but without chemicals, due to your tiny helpers and the oldest one's enjoyment of eating his harvest straight from the plant), and make sure the plants are well-pruned and watered, it can become a significant amount of work and time commitment.

Chemical-free case in point: he loves to lick/chew the end of rhubarb stalks.

For example, we spent a solid hour last weekend hunting for, picking, and burning squash bug eggs (and bugs, themselves, when we could).  We have had issues with these pests every year, and so far this year, we had been able to keep them at bay long enough to get a good harvest from our plants before the bugs destroyed them.  That Saturday morning, however, I found cluster after cluster of their eggs, and though the plants were nearly done producing anyway, my OCD (and anger with these annoying, relentless creatures) kicked in, and I enlisted help to hunt, find, and kill as many as possible.  I had just had a conversation with my mom (and garden mentor) about the fact that I had seen these bugs as eggs and adults, but nothing in between, and ironically, we saw everything in between that morning; from squishing an adult bug only to have eggs squish out, to actively hatching ones, to teenagers, to adults mating - it was simultaneously fascinating, infuriating, and disgusting.  I felt like a crazy person (and still do as I type it all out to share with the world) in my near-rampage to rid our beautiful plants of these parasites.

The only photo evidence I took time to collect, but do you see those little tiny hatchlings?!  So gross.  (This is also the morning Jacob learned the word "gross." Ha.)

We have also warded off tiny slugs this year, as well as white flies.  The moles have been very active, too, and we're still figuring out how to best get rid of them.  Again, I am thankful for a husband who is such a capable and willing partner in all this, as well as fellow gardeners who are always ready with suggestions and helpful hints.

The newest addition to the garden is our owl, Kawzaz (you can probably guess who named him).
He has seemed to be fairly effective in his job of scaring squirrels and birds away, and Jacob loves him (he asked for this picture to be taken).

If you follow me on social media and/or see our family on a regular basis, you know we have had an abundance of cucumbers and other produce this year...and have probably been offered some.  ☺  While I'm not up to tackling traditional canning, just yet, I did make some refrigerator pickles we enjoyed!  We also put out a cooler of produce in the middle of our neighborhood and had a few takers.

I wish I could've captured Jacob's explanation of this when he was telling a friend about the produce sign; he didn't miss a step when recounting how and why we made it, what it was for, or how others made use of it.

Not everything produced a bumper crop...the spinach got nipped by that late freeze, and this was our entire harvest. 
This picture still makes me laugh out loud.

There were a few weeks, however, that this was our harvest nearly every-other day!

The happiest basil leaves you ever did see (that's my hand!).

I can't remember how much I've mentioned our neighbors here, but we have some really amazing ones.  One of the couples has an awesome garden, and they challenged Jacob to a tomato-growing contest!  They gave him the plant (Beefsteak variety), helped him plant it, and regularly ask him how it's doing.  It was such a sweet gesture and gave him even more motivation to help me tend to the garden this year.  Of course, I made sure to document it:

So many pictures with boots!  Who knew these consignment sale treasures would be such a valuable investment.  We almost always go to the garden during Lydia's morning nap, so the grass is still very wet with dew.  Doesn't hurt that these are also the easiest and quickest for him to put on himself.  :)

It's fun (and crazy and sad) to see how much HE has grown, as well, in these few short months.

"It's almost ripe!"

Jacob asked if he could take some "up close pictures" of his plant.
This is one of sevvvveral.  ;)

This 13.4 oz.-er put him in first place, so far!

The produce we have harvested, enjoyed, and shared is not the only benefit we have experienced as a result of the hard work put into our garden.  

• It has taught Jacob the long-term value of putting forth time and effort to accomplish a goal.  I try very hard not to force or guilt anyone, especially Jacob, into helping.  Some days he'd rather not pull weeds, but others, it's something he is genuinely excited to do.  He has come to learn the more he helps out, the sooner we can move on to other activities.
• There have been numerous nature encounters, and therefore, lessons.  On a few occasions, they have directly correlated with the preschool curriculum we have been working through!
• We have been able to invite others to help and be part of the process, and they have truly enjoyed it.
• Our garden is a common and easy topic of conversation, especially when there are not many "neutral" things to make small talk about, lately.
• Obviously, but significantly, we get ample fresh air and vitamin D while working in the garden, and the calories burned don't hurt, either.

Most importantly, however, the time we spend together in the garden is...something I can't put into words.  Lovely, maybe?  Therapeutic, perhaps?  It is almost always free of conflict, whining and other behavioral issues, and distractions.  My personality type values productivity, so the fact that we are spending such focused, productive quality time together doing something we both enjoy is so good for my soul.  Truly.  Simply put, it's good for all of us.

I know this post is lengthy and the thoughts are vast, but perhaps now you can see how I came to the realization (even if everyone else already had) that gardening is one of my hobbies.  It is constant, un-glamorous, and demanding work, but the benefits far outweigh the costs.  When I am able to focus on those benefits, it really is something I enjoy.  Something that I do for pleasure.  A hobby.

Dirty fingernailedly,

Kensy

Favorites of the day:

chocolate chip cookies

I can't even handle her excitement about her first time in Grandma and Grandpa's sandbox.
(Yes, she ate several handfuls, and yes, we all survived.)

Jacob is including her in play more and more, and it is just so precious to me.
So is her smile...and her tiny sprout of a ponytail. 

Speaking of precious:
We went on our first proper date in who knows how long the other day.  So, of course, we asked our sitter to take a picture.  Jacob assumed he was to be included in this, and stepped right into the shot with the best unsolicited smile we've seen from him (while being photographed) in months.
We did end up getting a shot of just us (which we also haven't done in who knows how long), but there are lots of reasons to love this one, too.  :)

whoopsie-daisy (you wouldn't believe the rabbit hole I fell down when researching the correct spelling of this...)

Goodness! (Apparently, I say that a lot, because Jacob has adopted it into his fairly-extensive vocabulary.) How is it that suppertime around here can drag on for what seems to be hours as we wait for the eldest child to do more chewing and less talking, yet I can't tell you where the four months since I last posted have gone?!  What I can tell you, however, is that we've been thoroughly enjoying the weather - outside playdates, making great progress in the garden, and splashing in whatever body of water we can get our feet in.  We now have a four-yr.-old (what?!) and a nearly one-yr.-old (again - what?!).  Though some parts of life seem to be back to the old normal, we have certainly adapted to and become fairly content with a new normal.

An additional (and significant) piece of news is Bryant nearly lost a finger while protecting his family from a ferocious wild bear.

;)

That's what he refers to as the "fun" story, as opposed to the "real" version.   The truth is he actually lost a fight with a table saw that hadn't quite stopped turning while he was cleaning up after a project.  It was an accident in all senses of the word.  While it certainly could've been worse, it was still an emergency situation that ended up requiring reparative surgery and rehab therapy.

The injury occurred on Bryant's right index finger, and the surgery also affected his wrist.   During his recovery, he was instructed not to drive or lift, and at the beginning of it, he was not supposed to get that upper arm wet.  Needless to say, that put a wrench in our normal routine.

If you have ever cared for someone after surgery, you know how much there is to manage.  (I had not.)  If you know me at all, you know I'm pretty terrible at asking for help, so was prepared to figure it all out myself.  (I couldn't have.)  Thankfully, our village stepped in immediately...for real - I didn't even take him to the ER when it happened right at the supper/bath/bedtime crunch.  They went on to help in countless ways; to name a few:

• weedeating
• rides to appointments (including the initial ER trip)
• watching kiddos
• providing meals
• sending thoughtful notes, etc.
• coming over to help with baths and bedtime
• offering to mow the lawn
• lots of prayer and moral support

This help was not provided by just one person or one circle of friends.  Our neighbors, family members, church friends, and many others stepped in to help in our time of need, and we are so thankful.  

We are also incredibly thankful that Bryant was permitted to work from home while he was in the cast and not able to drive.  His job requires him to be on location for about 90% of the work he does, so we were definitely not expecting him to be able to work during this time.  His employer was very accommodating, though, and as a bonus, we got a couple extra hours with Bryant during the days, since he didn't have to commute, at all, and I was also able to sneak out for the occasional short errand during naptime.  Typing and moving a mouse with one non-dominant hand was no walk in the park, but he never complained.

Bryant's wounds have healed, he has regained nearly all the strength and range of motion he lost, and he is optimistic about his recovery.  It's amazing to us that all this happened in April - a little over three months ago.  It feels like forever ago, yet at the same time, only yesterday

I'll spare you the gory documentation, but for posterity's sake, here are a couple pictures of our patient at various stages in the recovery process:

I appreciated Bryant's intentionality and thoughtfulness during this time, as well as his willingness to be creative in finding ways to make things as normal as possible for the kids and I.  I know it was not easy to navigate caring for a wiggly baby and playing with an active toddler with one non-dominant hand, but he figured it out.  He also managed to make this delicious Mother's Day dinner (albeit with a little help):  

God's protection, provision, and peace were so evident to us in this situation.  It is not lost on us that the outcome of this accident could have been much more severe, people could have looked past our tricky circumstances, Bryant could have taken a pay cut for several weeks, there could have been complications with the surgery and/or recovery - the list goes on and on.  This is yet another of life's seemingly-major obstacles that is so alarming and consuming in the moment, yet in hindsight, becomes a small bump in the road.  No matter the size, we are glad to have this "bump" behind us.

Gratefully,

Kensy

Favorites of the day:

hospitality - both giving and receiving

These two.  Jacob has been so excited, lately, to get to sit next to Lydia in shopping carts, and without a thought, immediately puts his arm around her. ♥
Remember that time I was worried about how I'd feel about having two kiddos and about how Jacob would feel about a sibling?  Many of you told me how wonderful it would be, and while I believed you then, I understand you, now.  It's just priceless.

Our matching swimsuits!

Nothing and everything

Did anyone besides me think I'd actually get a post out on the precise "COVID-versary?"  A few days late isn't bad, though...especially given the year its been.  Right?  ;)  I didn't really intend to write a "one year later" post, but then, it all kind of hit me, and as you know, this is how I best process.  

I can't remember whether or not I've written much about the IF:Gathering in the past (and I can't afford the time to search the archives), so I'll give an elevator pitch here:

The IF:Gathering is a women's conference held in TX and live-streamed (even pre-2021) to viewers worldwide.  The theme each year centers around "IF" (What IF God is real?  What IF He keeps His promises?  How do we respond?).  This year, the theme was "Even:IF - Even IF the worst happens, we don't lose hope."  Women are invited to host IF:Locals in their churches, homes, schools, etc., and for the last few years, I have led a team to host an IF:Local at our church.  We typically gather Friday evening and most of Saturday to tune in to the live worship and speakers, share meals and snacks, participate in great conversation, and make a craft or two.  IF:2020 was one of the last big "things" in my/our life before the stay-at-home orders went into place. 

So, as I sat down to watch IF:2021 - alone, in our basement, while corresponding with ladies from our church on the live chat feature - I got teary.  Yes, we have missed several "normal" gatherings, events, occasions, etc. in the past year, but we found ways to work around them, compromise, and make the best of the worst.  Yes, this virtual IF:Gathering was the best possible work-around for all involved, and the IF team made it all so easy for us to tune in and stay as connected as possible - I wasn't sad because I had to miss out on the content, or anything.

Baby's first IF:Gathering
(just briefly during her before-bed feeding...so, I guess I wasn't alone the whole time - haha)

What made me most sad was the connection, conversation, quiet stillness, corporate worship, and honestly, yummy snacks we were all missing out on.  I was sad thinking about so many viewing it together, yet alone in our separate places, and knowing how much better it could be...how much better it always was.  I was sad knowing how much we're all craving normalcy and hugs and face-to-face, non-masked conversation.  I did what I could to make the ladies from our church who tuned in feel special and connected, but felt helpless to provide what I know at least I wanted: an extended period of time to ourselves, out of our homes, being filled spiritually, emotionally, physically, and relationally - not worrying about who's cooking or what's happening next or what else we should be doing.  As this was all hitting me harder than I expected, I was trying to figure out why.  

After a year of quarantine, it feels like nothing has changed.  We are still keeping to ourselves as much as possible.  We are still only making necessary shopping trips (for the most part).  We have only seen a handful of people face-to-face/"in real life" over the course of an entire year.  We go through the drive-thrus, pick out library books online, and have play dates and story time via FaceTime.  We are still hesitant to make concrete plans outside of our "bubble," not knowing what's coming next.  This has all started to feel normal, and I wish it didn't.

At the same time, however, as I think about our family and what's been going on in our little corner of the world for a year, now, everything has changed!  We are a family of four - we have TWO kids!  Our baby boy is nearing the end of toddlerhood.  Our new baby girl is over half a year old, now!  Whereas a year ago we hardly went two days in a row without getting out of the house, we've become accustomed to spending days on end at home...sometimes even without setting foot outside (thanks a lot, subzero temps).  Now, it's even sometimes our preference to stay home (granted, it's much easier to do so (see above note about the TWO kids)).  

While I still wish it didn't feel quite so normal to not have plans, to not see other people, to be home all the time, and to wear a mask, the year of "extreme togetherness" has been a gift in so many ways.  The lack of events, celebrations, and gatherings have allowed me to feel more content to just "be" in our new season of life.  It didn't feel like we were missing out on much, if anything, when we were in the newborn stage and even now, as we continue to live that "sleep, eat, play, repeat (and poop, if we're lucky)" life.  We've developed new rhythms, made lifestyle changes, and spent more time together than ever before, and I it has been so beneficial.    

God's timing, His peace, and His control are more evident to me as a result of this season than any other time in my life, I think.  He continues to provide in so many ways - both tangible and intangible; He always has.  Perhaps, I am just more attuned to it all.  Perhaps my head and heart are more clear, and therefore, able to take time and space to recognize these things, rather than being distracted by so much else.  Perhaps this is what I needed to learn and what I most need to take away from "all this COVID stuff" - to be more attentive to how God is working in my life, how He's showing up for me and those around me, and how I need to respond.

In spite of the hope vaccinations bring and the glimpses of normalcy the warmer weather may promise, the world is still so broken, unstable, and confusing.  God, on the other hand, is not.  He has not changed.  He is and was and forever will be hope, certainty, and peace.  He is our rock and our protector.  If only we will remember this and lean on Him...and encourage others to do so, as well.

May His peace, which surpasses all understanding, guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Lovingly and prayerfully,

Kensy

Favorites of the day:

sprouts and buds and all things spring

nap scheduled aligning (!!!!)

This girl...and this outfit from our "hand-me-downs collection."

#2, so far

I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this: someday, I hope to have these blog posts printed and bound.  Not published, mind you - just put into book form for posterity’s sake.  I’ve kept a couple journals in my lifetime and also have some pretty priceless documentation of childhood family vacations (read: time stamps of every rest stop, full menu rundowns of every meal, and riveting reviews of destinations like “Neat!” and “Cool!”), but otherwise, this is the closest I’ve come to documenting life happenings and associated emotions.  So, that’s why I often say I’m writing something for posterity’s sake.  I share it all publicly, because family and friends are so spread out, and while I’d love to catch up with each of you over coffee, or even quick phone conversation, that’s just not feasible (even pre-COVID).  Since I know you care, though, I utilize “the scoop” to keep you in the loop.  (Jacob’s really into rhyming words, these days. You can maybe tell we hang out a lot...)

Ok - onto the real reason for posting today.  Actually - a few reasons.  First, wanted to document the first photo Jacob has taken:

Not this one.  This is just the one that "started it all..."
Lydia was out of pajamas before anyone else this morning, because she lost some of her first breakfast on hers.  So, wanted to document this cute outfit from Aunt Roo before any second breakfast ended up on it.

Then, Jacob asked to be in a photo (I'll almost always oblige him here, because I know (assume) the day will come that it will be a struggle to get him to pose for a picture, much less smile.)
Look at them looking at each other! ♥
The sweet kid even asked if he "did his good smile," because when he went through the "silly smile" phase, we often asked for a "good smile," and turns out, he didn't really know how to consciously make that happen.

THEN, he said, "Now I should take one of you two!" 
The idea/offer really surprised me - he's never asked or been asked to take a picture.  I almost declined, because I wasn't "photo ready" with my morning face and second-day braids (post-partum hair loss is in full swing, so I'm doing anything I can to contain all the rogue strands), but I quickly decided to just oblige HIM and see what happened.
The above is a sampling of the 50+ shots he got, some of which I truly love (mostly because Lydia - I mean, come on) and others of which I didn't plan to share publicly, but then, why not?

Secondly, many of you probably saw a recent post I made on Instagram about how real life has been, lately. I’ll share it here for reference:

Lydia and I haven’t slept in more than 2-3 hour stretches for several weeks. 

Jacob has been struggling with following directions and not talking back, lately, and sugar from special treats (like once-annual snow ice cream) do him no favors in this department. 

Meal-planning is still a pipe dream, because time is precious and I prioritize other things (like playing in the snow), even though lack of planning and prep aren’t helping me reach my pre-pregnancy body goals (no need for this to become a body image thing - I could probably write a whole post on that - I have a lot of grace for myself, right now; it’s just a matter of fact that my clothes don’t fit like I wish they did).
The “survival mode”-ness of this season often makes me feel like I’m failing as a wife and friend. 
All that said, hard things like those mentioned are more easily forgiven/forgotten in light of sweet moments like those captured in these snowy day pictures (as well as so many others I post on the regular). 
So thankful for God’s grace and the way He provides rest when possible and baby smiles when it’s fleeting, extra doses of patience and unsolicited hugs, and a true teammate of a husband as we navigate this whole parenting thing. 
I know everyone has their own version of a “things are not always as they seem” sort of post, and I don’t know that I’ve really written one. So, please just know that while we do have some pretty sweet moments with our really cute kids, there are several hard moments to go along with each. It’s just really dark and difficult to take pictures at 2, 3, and 4 a.m. and shots of a tantruming toddler are usually blurry. 😏
#lovethem #snowday #thatprobablyshouldvebeenablogpost 😬

I received so many kind and encouraging comments, notes, and even surprise mail after posting that.  Thanks to those of you who took time to share your two cents!  I thought I’d update you on how things are going, now:

Sleep is on the upswing!  Prior to her 4-month appt., I was feeding Lydia on demand - supplementing with formula after daytime feedings and just nursing at nighttime.  So, even though her night was from about 7 p.m.-7 a.m., she was crying out several times, and in an effort to make sure she was receiving the nourishment she needed (and keep her quiet so as not to wake Jacob in the next room), I just fed her each time.  (This was after figuring out she wanted her arms out of the swaddle...and always trying the pacifier first, only for her to reject it.)  Of course, my body often wouldn't allow me to go right back to sleep after being up, and on more than one occasion, Jacob called out for something in the middle of the night between Lydia's feedings.  My silver lining in all this was being able to crawl back under my cozy electric blanket several times a night - haha.

I was anxious to see how Lydia's growth was progressing and talk to the doctor about her thoughts on nighttime, and I was so glad to know she's right on track growth-wise and we can skip nighttime feedings (all except for one, if we want).  We're about a week out from that appt. and starting our new habits, but it's already such a relief.  Though she still wakes up most of the times she was previously, I'm only feeding her once in the middle of the night, and she has been able to put herself back to sleep after only a few minutes of sleepy crying the other times.  Phew.  Here's hoping she'll continue dropping some(all!) of those waking-up times ASAP.

This is how she often sleeps.  I know the lighting isn’t great, but I wasn’t going to risk waking her for a pic.  Just wanted to try to document her little hands behind her head. ♥

Jacob is doing better, behavior-wise, most days.  I truly think this is due to us cutting down on his sugar intake.  He wasn't having a lot, in the first place, but we've just been careful to not give him much, at all, in a day's time.  The few times we've given him a treat or had an out-of-the-ordinary day have made it very evident that he has a harder time controlling himself when he's had more sugar than normal.  It's crazy.  And kinda sad, because I'd love to share more treats with him, but it's been good to find other things to reward him with...which, in turn, helps create better habits for ourselves...

...speaking of which - we have a plan in place for that!  More on that later (hopefully).

Also - we’re just over a year since finding out we were expecting baby #2, so thought I’d reflect a bit on how the having two kids thing is going.  I actually don't know that I can concisely put it all into words, so I'll just leave a short bullet-point list, for now:

• It's gone better than I expected, which may actually be thanks to COVID.  There's not a lot pulling us in other directions/outside of our home, so we've been able to create and maintain rhythms that make the most sense for us, right now.  While I'm sad to not be able to "share" Lydia more, I'm glad for the valid excuse to lay low and keep her routine in tact most every day.
• I love watching Jacob be a big brother.  As Lydia has started to be more and more interactive, he's been more and more interactive with her.  He's a wonderful and willing helper (a lot of the time without even being asked...esp. when it comes to fetching clean diapers), he's including her in his play (again - without being asked), and he cheers her on with every new development.  It's just precious.
• I forgot how much I love babies.  I mean, yeah - I knew and know I love babies, but I kinda forgot why.  The cooing, the smiling, the squishiness - it's just all so sweet.
• Surprise - I really can love two kiddos equally and at the same time. ♥

As always, thanks to you all for sharing our journey - from near or afar - and caring about our family.  Looking forward to the day we can visit/see you in person, but in the meantime, thanks for keeping in touch.  Take care!

Motherly-ly,

Kensy

Favorites of the day:

Anita's Famous Rolls

Marco Polo (the app)

gift cards
the new Brown Sugar Chai Latte from Scooter's (I've only had it blended, so far, but anxious to try it hot!)